Forgiving Abusers - 90 Days of Meditations

Why forgive? For us it is very simple. If we don’t forgive, we’re never free.  (White Book, 126)


My response to abusive experiences while growing up was to engage in sexual encounters. My illicit sexual behavior, however, filled me with shame. After years of trying but failing to stop my lustful habits, I found SA. Here I learned that my resentment and anger against my childhood abusers were feeding my sexual addiction. While I thought I had put those memories behind me and moved on with my life, Steps One through Four showed me otherwise. The Steps put me in touch with a Higher Power who forgave me my wrongs. The healing power of Steps also showed me that to be free I would have to forgive my abusers.

It is not easy to change a lifetime of resentments. Yet I knew it had to be done if I wanted sobriety, peace, and joy. So, with courage from my Higher Power and guidance from my SA sponsor, I worked all Twelve Steps. Eventually I was able to forgive my tormentors, as well as myself.

I no longer see myself as a victim of my childhood, or of my former decisions. Now I can examine issues squarely, and with God’s help and the wisdom of the SA Program, I can make the right decisions.

God, help me to regard my abusers with the same spirit of compassion that I am able to show newcomers to the SA Program.


90 Days of Meditations, Page 11 Sexaholics Anonymous